


Psychosis

by Tom_Tomorrow



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, Big Sister Alex Danvers, Big Sister Maggie Sawyer, F/F, Mental Instability
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-03
Updated: 2017-07-03
Packaged: 2018-11-22 21:18:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,470
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11388621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tom_Tomorrow/pseuds/Tom_Tomorrow
Summary: And Winn explains that the transporter malfunctioned.But Vasquez says it was a lab technician putting his hands where it wasn't supposed be.J'onn says something else entirely.And Maggie doesn't know who's right.Just that everything is wrong. \\\Dealing with a device from a different universe has dangerous repercussions.





	Psychosis

**Author's Note:**

> Author’s Note: I always thought that it was a little too convenient that Winn was able go and fix a replica of that multiverse hopping thing and they were subsequently able to use it perfectly with no determinable consequences. Now, I have never seen the Flash, so I don’t know if anything ever happened concerning that on the other show. But jumping universes is kind of complex, and as great as everyone is, I doubt that they could work it flawlessly. And... I’m a sucker for angst, so this one shot became a thing.
> 
>  
> 
> Slight AU in that, the Musical Mister thing never happened and Sanvers haven’t proposed, only live together, but still set some time after season 2.

... .... ...

 

Maggie Sawyer’s life is a science fiction movie.

She’s accepted that years ago.

Between the secret government organization her girlfriend works for, the red caped superhero that makes rounds around the city, and the thousands of terrestrial beings who now have every right to call Earth their home...

Now the detective has, survived a Daxamite Invasion, to add to the ever-lengthening list of things she’d never thought she would live to see.

When she first joined the force, back in Gotham City, the weirdest thing she’d had to really consider was an elusive vigilante with a bat fetish that consistently roamed the streets at night.

But National City is a whole different ball game.

At this point, she wouldn’t have batted an eye if a whole swarm of bat vigilantes descended upon them.

Because hell, if everything else hadn’t had a go at the city already.

In another lifetime, it all would have come straight out of a sci-fi film.

Terminator or some shit like that.

She’s accepted that years ago.

So, when a lanky, brunette speedster shoots into the halls of the DEO claiming he’s from an alternate universe while the detective is waiting on Alex for lunch one day, Maggie is apprehensive, but not entirely too surprised.

But Alex knows him. As does Winn. And Kara is ecstatic.

His name is Barry Allen.  And he’s quirky and tall and fidgety. 

Basically, the male version of Kara.

And he brings with him a man who goes by Cisco, who for all intents and purposes is a replica of Winn.

They say they need Kara’s help.

And Kara turns to Alex with pleading eyes.

But Alex is hesitant.

They go anyway.

Kara promises one day.

They’re gone for five.

Alex runs up the walls for five days.

Maggie tries to keep Alex calm for five days.

Kara comes back with at the end of the fifth day.

With Barry and Cisco and another boy, Wally.

Apologizes profusely for being gone so long.

Says that the big bad was a little more bad than originally thought.

The latter are in a rush, though they say how sorry, how grateful, how glad they are.

They say they’ll keep in touch and leave a broken transporter device behind.

Whether on purpose or on accident.

Regardless, Winn sets to work on it. Ecstatically.

Because in their world the reality of multiverses is too big of a deal to pass up.

In their world, its Nobel prize worthy.

Not that Winn would ever go for that.

It would most likely be kept under lock and key at the DEO.

But it won’t be destroyed. Its potential usefulness is undeniable.

A speedster or an ice queen or any of the others that Kara incessantly talks about, could prove helpful in any future endeavors.

Because there will be more.

It’s the only verifiable thing about National City.

So, they will try to make it work. 

Even when the detective thinks they shouldn’t. 

Thinks like a police officer, when she thinks of the chaos it could invite. 

Because not everyone can be as kind and happy as Barry and his crew.

And just because it’s possible, doesn’t mean it should happen.

But she’s not part of the DEO.

So, Maggie brings it up, but doesn’t fight for it.

She should have.

 

… … … … … …. …

 

“Maggie! MAGGIE! Get over here now!”

 

It’s Winn. He’s hysterical.

His urgent words shouting out of the phone at her ear.

But his alarm isn’t what spikes her own unease.

It’s the background noise.

She can hear beeping monitors.

Can hear fluttering papers.

J’onn maintaining calm.

And she can hear Alex.

Yelling at somebody.

Her nerves run cold and her jaw clenches as she reaches for her jacket.

 

“What happened?”

 

Maggie demands as she makes for the door.

 

“It’s Kara.”

 

Nothing more is explained after that.

Nothing more needs to be explained after that.

Because Alex only gets so worked up when it’s Kara. 

And when she gets to the DEO, it’s confirmed that it is Kara.

That it was Kara.

They don’t know where she is.

Just that she isn’t here.

She was.

Now she wasn’t.

And Winn explains that the transporter malfunctioned.

But Vasquez says it was a lab technician putting his hands where it wasn’t supposed be.

J’onn says something else entirely.

And Maggie doesn’t know who’s right.

Just that everything is wrong.

The dangers of dealing with a device from a different universe don’t go unnoticed.

Not by Alex who was a scientist in her own right.

Not by J’onn who has years upon years of experience. 

Not by Winn who was forced to go through a bunch regulatory shit and move forward with a full team of scientists.

Not even by Kara, who despite interjecting herself into secret missions at the most inopportune times, knows the limitation.  

So, it’s clear that whatever happened here wasn’t deliberate on their part.

But she can’t bring herself to care about the reason behind it.

And Alex is livid as Maggie shuffles in between her and the lab technician.

And Winn is frantic as he types at the computers.  Trying to get a signature on Kara’s tracker.

And J’onn is shouting orders.

And Kara...  is gone.

 

... ... ... ..

 

Fifteen days pass.

Fifteen days of no progress, no signs, no nothing.

Kara’s tracker is offline.

Her apartment is untouched.

Her glasses were on the table, where she’d put them moments before everything had happened. Alex holds them now.

It is as if the blonde disappeared into thin air.

Because she has disappeared into thin air. 

Only the transporter device remains behind, almost mockingly.

Winn blames himself.

He thinks he should have figured out the fail safes and the pitfalls. Sooner rather than later.

 J’onn blames himself.

He thinks he should have known the lab technician wasn’t able to be in such a precarious project.

Maggie blames herself.

She thinks that maybe, if she’d been there something may have turned out different.

Alex tears herself apart.

Because Alex is her sister’s keeper. Her sister’s defender. Her sister’s protector.

And it’s true, that Maggie’s never seen a bond stronger than the one shared by the Danvers sisters.

Bound by trauma, fortified by that fierce protectiveness, reinforced in their years of constant togetherness.

Unbreakable.

They would die for each other. Without a second thought.

Eliza may have been Kara’s adoptive mother and Clark may have been blood, but arguably no one has devoted more of their time to assuring Kara’s well-being than Alex Danvers herself.

And that bond comes out full force now.

 Alex won’t sleep until she has too. Won’t eat until she has too.

 Her girlfriend throws herself into finding her sister.

 And Alex is terrified to call her mother, to tell her what happened.

 Terrified to call Clark and tell him that Kara’s missing.

 Alex is certain that they will blame her.  

 Even though Maggie is almost certain that they won’t.

 And the detective can’t stand to see Alex like this.

 It’s a suffocating feeling that closes her throat and burns her lungs.

 To watch Alex fraying at the edges, burrowing herself in despair.

 So, she tries to find the words to convey.

 Tries to find words that will bring comfort, words that will make things better.

The tattered edges of her voice don’t vanish, even when she pushes them down hard.

But it doesn’t matter anyway, because she can’t find the words to say.

So, she does the next best thing.

Forces the salt away from her eyes, and pulls Alex into a firm, overtly caring kind of a hug.

 The type she’s used for years down the line whenever someone close was falling.

And Alex relaxes into her touch.

And Alex cries.

And Maggie holds on.

It doesn’t really make anything better.

 

Kara is still gone.

 

... ...

 

And then she’s there.

 Kara.

 After almost three weeks someone finally pushes the right sequence of buttons.

 And she appears in the very laboratory she’d disappeared from.

 On her knees.

 Bent slightly forward.

 Skin pale, arms limp at her sides, with cobalt eyes that are completely, terrifyingly vacant.

And she always had that about her, that look of otherness, of eyes that see things much too far, and of thoughts that wander off the edge of the world.

 But there had always been life, a spark, a sign of liveliness inside, now, now it’s an empty one-thousand-yard stare.

 It is bad, but still, not as bad as she expected.

 At least the blonde isn’t seizing on the floor.

 At least the blonde isn’t bloody, battered, and bruised.

 Honestly, Maggie is just happy to see that Kara’s breathing.

 It takes them all a beat or two to snap out of it, to fully realize what is going on.

 And it’s Alex whose first, Alex who jerks forward, Alex who is on her own knees in front of her sister.

 One hand on the blonde’s shoulder the other on the marble floor.

 

“Hey, hey, Kara. Hey.”

 

Alex’s voice is low and wobbly. Watery with relief.

 But Maggie can hear every word even when it’s whispered.

 Because the rest of them are still frozen. Breaths bated as they watch the exchange.

 There's no response from Kara.

 No sound, no movement, no nothing.

 Kara stares right past her.

 

“Kara, hey, look at me. **Kara.”**

But it doesn’t reach her.

 Alex’s knuckles tighten on her sister’s shoulder

 The slight pressure seems to work, marginally; Kara blinks once, twice, and her brow stitches together.

But her eyes are still unfocused, empty, desolate.

Encouraged, Alex shakes her sister again.

 

“Come on, Kar, come on...”

 

Alex whispers quietly, desperately.

And Maggie feels like she’s watching something private. Something she shouldn’t be seeing.

But she needs to know that Kara is okay too. Because even when they’re not blood, it still feels like family.

For a long, painful moment nothing else happens.

Then, as if a switch had been flipped, awareness lights up the blonde’s once vacant eyes.

 Her entire form pitches forward violently and Kara lets out a raking gasp as her hands fall to catch herself against the floor.

 Until she’s balancing on her palms, drawing in the deep, raking breaths of a drowning man.

 

“It’s okay, it’s okay.”

 

Alex is whispering.

 

“Alex?”

 

Kara’s voice is raspy and hoarse and terribly heavy.

And her cobalt gaze slides over her sister’s shoulder.

Darting around to the occupants of the room.

To Winn. To Vasquez. To Lucy. To her.

 And when their eyes lock, she looks haunted. She looks confused. She looks scared.

 

“I’m here... I’m here...”

 

Alex soothes.

Hand moving from her Kara’s shoulder, to sweep the dirty blonde hair away from her sister’s face.

 

“Alex... I... I... I don’t...”

 

And the blonde is trembling. Shaking.

 

“I... I... I’m really tired.”

 

She says, looking away, her voice so small that it makes Maggie feel lost.

 

“Kara, you need the sun lamps okay?”

 

The elder Danvers sister suggests as gently as she can, but the blonde is unfocused again, with her eyes trained at the ground.

As if she’s hiding from them, retreating into her own skin as she tries to disappear into the metallic coverings.  

And Maggie motions for the others too leave the room.  To give her space.

Granting the tiniest bit of privacy, until it’s just Alex, J’onn, Kara, and the detective herself.

The tension doesn’t leave with them.

 

“Look at me, Kara. Do you know where are right now?”

 

Forcefully calm and reassuring.

 

“I... I can’t... Alex... Can you come get me?”

 

It’s all the permission Alex needs before she’s pulling her sister into her arms.

Maggie needs to look elsewhere for a moment and blink the salt away.

Because she’s not going to cry. She’s not.

... ...

 

They can’t get much more information from Kara.

Nothing coherent anyway.

The blonde says a sentence here and there.

Most of them don’t even seem related at all to what they’re asking.

It’s obvious that she’s having trouble concentrating.

Kara’s just tired, Maggie likes to think. Exhausted.

 In reality, she’s out of focus.

 Eyes constricting and dilating.

 Muscular legs shaking as if she’s never stood before.

 Leaning heavily against Alex who is coaxing her towards the sunlamps.

 J’onn is ahead.

 Clearing the way, setting up the lamps, designating a quarantine area.

 And he makes that clear to them before they even begin helping Kara up.

 That there is a real possibility that the blonde could have brought something dangerous back with her.

 That they need to run through a battery of tests.

 He doesn’t tell them they need to stay from Kara.

 Probably because he knows they won’t listen.

 Maggie trails behind. Wanting to help further, but not sure where to interject herself.

 Alex carves a space for her.

 Unhesitatingly, shifting Kara off to her, once she has the blonde situated on the table.

 Moving for diagnostic equipment.

 And the detective curls her hand around the blonde’s shaking one, not pulling away even when the grip is reciprocated just a bit to tightly.

Under the fluorescent glow, Kara is restless, rambling in her barely lucid state.

Incoherent murmurs at first, but they turn into words soon enough – or maybe they don’t, only that Alex seems to understand the language Kara is speaking.

Though Maggie can pick out words here and there. From the basic phrases that Kara had taught her a while back.

Then almost fluidly, the language shifts back to English.

Just as garbled, thick, and uncohesive.

And Maggie wishes she didn’t switch languages, because understanding is almost worse.

Kara lies there speaking of light and darkness, red and white and black.

Of murky waters and strobes of lights and raging fire, of stars and planets, so achingly  _close_  –

And pain.

And Maggie can see Alex’s jaw clench as she presses gel electrodes against her sister’s cool, pallid skin.

 The machines say more than words could ever say.

 Her brainwaves are scattered. Sporadic. Glitchy.

Fried.

As if high voltages of electricity are being run through them.

 “It wasn’t like Barry’s...”

 The blonde whispers.

 Fractured and broken and quiet.

 Barely heard over the steady hum of electricity

Then Kara turns over, away from them, relinquishing her grip on Maggie’s hand, burying her head into her arm, as if to block out whatever it is talking to her.

Because even when she’s here, it still seems like she’s gone.

... .. ...

 

The worst is over, somewhere inside the detective’s mind she likes to think that.

 Likes to think Kara is only one step away from taking back her sanity.

 She’s strong, powerful. Faster than a speeding bullet, leaps over buildings with a single bound.

So how can she not?

 The sun lamps will do their jobs.

 Kara will be fine and walking by tomorrow morning.

 She likes to think that.

 

But just because it’s possible, doesn’t mean it will ever be true.

 

**Author's Note:**

> What did you think?


End file.
